The other day, my fingertips flew over the keyboard keys as I composed an ever-so-emotional post about the purpose in who your (my) parents are. Tears pooled in my eyes & I knew I couldn’t post it. I would sound too emotional. Too angry. Too sad. Too all over the place. I saved the draft & so it sits with 6ish other unfinished posts.
When situations are messy, emotions are too. This is a less-than-fun truth to come to grips with. Emotions can be chaotic, deceitful & just downright overwhelming. Emotions need honest evaluating & intentional managing. Both of which most of us aren’t willing to do.
Today’s world pushing the “feelings agenda” doesn’t help us ladies (or men for that matter) learn how to honestly evaluate & intentionally manage our emotions. We are constantly bombarded with the notion that what we feel is true. The end. Period. What a tactful agenda to push when you think about it. Anything goes, each person’s truth isn’t debatable & that creates chaos that often overshadows more important issues, along with other things. End tiny rant 🙂
I can think of numerous instances in which a feeling of mine changed momentarily & then changed again. I’ve felt nervous to share something vulnerable with someone & that faded once I opened up to that person. I’ve felt angry at my fiance’ when we haven’t seen eye to eye & that faded when we found a middle-ground compromise. I’ve felt depressed about an unmoving situation & that faded when I chose to focus on what I could “move” in the situation.
God made us emotional beings on purpose. He created all the emotions we feel, after all. Emotions aren’t bad, but what we do with them can lead us down a path that isn’t the healthiest option. When we choose to honestly evaluate what we’re feeling & intentionally manage our feelings, we’re onto something good! When we choose to let our feelings run the show, we choose less than the best for ourselves.
So, how can we honestly evaluate our emotions? This takes awareness & answering the vulnerable question of, “Is this based on a feeling or truth?” I’ve found myself saying that I don’t like someone without really knowing them. I then ask myself if I feel that way out of an insecurity I have, if they remind me of someone who has hurt me, etc. OR if that person has actually done something that would merit me not being so fond of them. Sadly, more times than not, the root is something lacking within myself (whether it’s confidence, joy, etc.). It is in those moments that I must choose to get over myself & give that person a chance, no matter the vulnerability risk. That is the second part of the equation… intentionally managing the emotion(s).
What this all comes down to is choice. The “feelings agenda” leaves everyone a victim to their feelings & the feelings of others. What a prison-like existence…
Instead, let’s live honestly & intentionally. We have a choice in all of this.